i can't believe i had my finger in that
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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