i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize