My hand turned me down
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
