and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
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I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize