They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Randomize