I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
In other news, I just burned my penis
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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