My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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