this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
