Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
