is this the sara with the beer cane?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
