Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
