I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
