508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Dignity is for republicans.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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