Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
