just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize