it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
