She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
