She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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