In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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