But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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