no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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