You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize
