But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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