I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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