I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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