erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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