My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
