I cockslap morals
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?