So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
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tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
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Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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