Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
whose parrot is this?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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