the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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