how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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