so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
