i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
