So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
