sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
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