Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
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I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
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Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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