Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
why didn't you poke me back
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
