I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Randomize
