ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF