Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
