My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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