Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize