Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
