You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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