He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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