it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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