What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Come see our sink grown plant.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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