Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
