Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize